The lines of communication that seemed open only a year ago now require a crowbar to extract even the simplest information…. “How was school today?”.  Suddenly your daughter has seemingly disappeared into a cult where the other members are equally secretive and the unwritten rules so complex that no parent can hope to gain access.

But the greatest mistake is for any parent to imagine that their daughter doesn’t want them in her life, doesn’t value their love and support, or that she doesn’t love them.  The truth is - despite much evidence to the contrary - in the vast majority of cases your daughter is happy with the relationship she has with you.

I recently conducted the largest ever survey of teenage girls in Australia together with Girlfriend Magazine, and of the 14,000 girls teenage girls who responded,  73% said they were happy with the relationship they have with their parents!!  I suspect for many of you that may come as a great surprise.

We asked the girls a host of questions about themselves and their lives and we also gave them an opportunity to write about the things in their lives they felt passionate about.  An incredible 7,000 girls chose to write more than 690,000 words about their lives, their loves, their fears and their dreams. 

And that is what “Get To Know Your Daughter" is all about.  I've sorted through and organised these heartfelt and personal responses to provide a tool to help parents fathom and navigate the complex world of teenage girls.  Reading their words and understanding the deeper workings of their minds and hearts will give you a chance to get to know your daughter in a way she actually wishes you could.  In many cases she’d love to give you the key to that door but more than likely she doesn't even know she's holding it in the first place.  So, click on "Your Daughter" in the menu above when you're ready to explore this amazing material.

There are also personal experiences from the parents point-of-view written in their own words on the "Your Voice" page so you can see that you're not alone on this journey - you can also contribute if you wish.  And you can also take part in an online forum to "Chat" live to other parents about the many issues you no doubt will have in common.

My desire, and the reason I created the GirlForce book series and brand, was to help girls understand that it was OK to celebrate themselves - just the way they are.  And as GirlForce has grown and the membership of the GirlForce Network blossomed, I’ve come to understand that to really support the girls I’ve also been compelled to find a way to support parents. 

The teen years can be challenging for both girls and their parents but one thing is certain, your teenage daughter needs and values you more now than she ever did and probably ever will.  I do hope these insights will help build an easier and richer relationship.

Warm regards,

Nikki Goldstein.